Apparently, ladybirds with deadly STI’s are invading the UK. I have no fucking idea if this story is true, I just saw it on Facebook and thought I would write a post about how to avoid to these dangerous STI’s so everyone can breathe a little easier.
Ok, first things first, don’t have sex with a Ladybird! That’s a sentence I thought I would never have to write. What the flying fucking, who the fuck is having sex with ladybirds anyway? Now, I didn’t read this article because it sounds like utter bullshit just from the title. However, if there are people worried about catching an STI from a ladybird then you really need to evaluate some shit in your life. STI stands for Sexually Transmitted Disease, what this means boys and girls is that you must fuck a ladybird to catch this disease. Now, I know ladybirds are cute, they are very cool little insects, perhaps one of the most loved insects, but who the fuck is fucking them?
If people are fucking ladybirds in this country and people are warning us to not fuck these particular ones then they are warning us about the wrong fucking thing. They need to warn us about fucking any insect because it is creepy, weird and really offers far more questions than answers. I have images in my head that I really never wanted to have.
So, in short – as short as your dick would need to be to fuck a ladybird – don’t fuck ladybirds of any kind, it’s weird!