I am undesirable

In the last few years, it has become increasingly clear to me that the actions and characteristics of others that I find most undesirable are the actions and characteristic that I see in myself. I’m not sure if everyone sees this but I think it might be an unconscious thing, we see something that we hate about ourselves in someone else and this makes us dislike them even more.

I will give you an example, I used to dislike people who made excuses for anything and everything. You know the people, ‘I couldn’t do this thing that could change my life because I had to feed my pet ferret and then I had to go and feed my mum’s hamster’ (I made that up, but you know what I mean). This characteristic was undesirable to me for so long and I realised one day that I was one of the people I found undesirable. I was the person that I wished would stop moaning about their life when all they do is make excuses to not do the thing that would make their life better. That was a wake call that I needed and since then, I haven’t made excuses much, I still do it every now and then, but most of the time I own my laziness and mistakes.

Screenshot_2016-04-05-08-22-05_editedLike I said, I have no idea if this is something everyone does or if it is indeed your unconscious telling you that you are looking at something you hate about yourself. All I know is that now when I see a characteristic or action that I find undesirable, I start to look at myself a little closer, which means I’m vain now and that’s undesirable too, ah fuck!

Improv word: Undesirable


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