You know that feeling that you get when you have inspiration running through your veins? The feeling that you have to do something towards this new found idea right away because nothing else matter as much as this? I have that at the moment. The problem is, I don’t know where to begin or how to start. I know that many of you will be saying, just start and see what happens, which is a valid way of thinking but I thought I would turn to writing to sort out this mess of emotions and thoughts.
Writing has always been my way of releasing this built up nervous, inspired, energy. Well, that and skateboarding. Skateboarding, for me, was something I did when I needed to forget about life. I skated a lot during my GCSE’s because I put myself under so much pressure that I needed to get the fuck out of there, it’s safe to say skating is probably why I fucked my GCSE’s up but it also got me to where I am today so it is forgiven.
Skating has taught me a lot, it taught me that hanging out on industrials estates at the weekend is a lot of fun, chicks dig scars and to never give up. When you are trying a new trick and keep falling off, you automatically stand back up and try again because you know the feeling of going home without the trick in your trick bag is far worse than the pain you’re in right now. When you finally roll away, which could take hours or days, the feeling you have at that exact moment is what keeps you skating.
This is a feeling that we have in normal life when we finally get to the position in life we want to be in. All of the dead ends, the shit exam results, the pay cuts, they are all worth it when we get to that place. Life is just like skating, especially for someone like me. I have no qualifications, at all, it probably isn’t even safe for me to be using this laptop! Yet all I have to do is try fucking hard and I will get somewhere, doors might be shut in my face on the way but I’ll just build a new door to which only I have the key and lock it when the person who shut the door in my face comes knocking for a chance.
If you think I am putting myself down and begging for sympathy, I’m not at all. I just know what my flaws and weaknesses are. I know this from experience, I am really bad at a lot of things and I am good (not great) at other things. But knowing my limits and what I still need to learn allows me to learn the important stuff and avoid everything else. Knowing what I want to do with my life and having the knowledge to be able to do what I want to do, is all I need. All the other learning is just extra if I want it to be.
My last post was all about your dreams evolving and letting go of them and allowing them to grow and shrink. This article just evolved right in front of your eyes, it started with an idea about something new I want to try and has evolved into talking about skateboarding.